Wednesday, March 21, 2012

What Spring Brings


Welcome Spring!


It might still be frigid outside but I can hear the birds chirp from every room of the house. The sun is peeking through the clouds on a regular basis. The daffodils are blooming one by one, color is gracing the landscape. A friend stopped by while I was mowing my lawn and we both took a moment to enjoy the smell freshly cut grass. I am watching a friends dog, a black lab, he wants to be outside 99% of the day which helps me get out and take in the changing of the seasons. My bikes are getting tuned up.


My energy levels are reflective of the season, I feel like I am ready to burst with joy yet cautious of the coming months because it still could snow. Storms are always brewing but looking past the impending dark clouds, there are always blue skies.  


That's the way that the world goes 'round.
You're up one day and the next you're down.
It's half an inch of water and you think you're gonna drown.
That's the way that the world goes 'round.
-John Prine

I have blossomed into a new season of my life, Winter was harsh, but like most things, they pass, seasons change.  I am a believer that all things happen for a reason. Out of darkness comes light and light lets us see a bit clearer. 


Miscarrying our first baby was hard in so many ways, the burden was heavy and it still haunts me as it will for a long time I imagine. That is okay, life is humbling, we can deal with the best of intentions. I keep on reminding myself that there was reasoning behind the whole mess, the baby was not healthy for reasons beyond our control. Why did it happen? We will never know and I don't need to know. 

I know that looking back is futile, looking forward is downright exciting. Everything changes, that is just the way that the world goes round. I am a stronger person. I have not found the words to describe how I feel these days, it will come to me slowly, right now I am enjoying the new light I have on life. The heavy pressure that I put myself through, the fight for perfection, the years of self restraint and guilt are slowly letting go. I am coming to understand who the true Michelle is. I am comfortable with her, I am comfortable with me. I would not wish this experience on anyone nor do I ever want to do it again. The personal growth that came from the events of the last few months and years have been priceless and now I know that every thing happens for a reason.


8 comments:

  1. what beautiful flowers! in carolina we've been experiencing spring since february.. love your blog & love the post under this one too!

    http://xoxo-carolinalove.blogspot.com

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  2. Great post! Great pics! Great words!

    Love you!

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  3. I love daffodils, they're such happy flowers!

    Mal @ The Chic Geek

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    Replies
    1. I do too, I have nearly 250 bulbs this year, not including the tulips!

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  4. i can't wait for spring... it's been such a long winter here!

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